{"title":"T-Shirts","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eWelcome to the \u003cstrong\u003eSmileyGolf T-Shirt Collection\u003c\/strong\u003e — where everyday style meets full-blown golf obsession.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eThese aren’t your typical course polos. These are premium lifestyle tees built for the Certified Golf Sicko® who’s nutting every day — whether you’re ripping it at Scottsdale and Phoenix, dreaming of Bandon Dunes, Streamsong, and Cabot, grinding at the gym, traveling to Portugal, crushing steaks in Tampa, or just repping the lifestyle in Clearwater.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eEach design features your favorite dimple-faced walnut (that’s me, Don Panchito, cabrón!) rocking the signature visor, big cheesy grin, and that trusty club ready to rip. We’ve taken those legendary classic logos you know and love — and given them the full SmileyGolf treatment with Certified Golf Sicko® energy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 dir=\"auto\"\u003eCollection Standouts:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Logo Parodies\u003c\/strong\u003e — Coca-Cola, Mr. Peanut, BAZOOKA JOE, POLO, KRISPY KREME, and more — all spun with our signature golf sicko twist\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSignature Slogan Tees\u003c\/strong\u003e — “Certified Golf Sicko® …nutting every day!”\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIconic Walnut Drops\u003c\/strong\u003e — Bold SmileyGolf logo in black, white, and fire orange\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eLifestyle Graphics\u003c\/strong\u003e — Subtle dimple patterns, hidden puns, and pure unhinged golf energy\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eFrom the desert fairways of Scottsdale\/Phoenix to the links of Bandon Dunes, Streamsong, and Cabot — these tees travel everywhere the real sickos go. Perfect for airport lounges, post-round burgers, or just letting the world know you’re always thinking about golf.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eSoft. Strong. Slightly unhinged. Just like your boy Don Panchito.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eShop the full SmileyGolf T-Shirt Collection now and join the nut house.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCertified Golf Sicko® …nutting every day!\u003c\/strong\u003e 🏌️♂️🥜\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e— Don Panchito \u003cbr\u003eSpiritual Leader of These Golf Nutz\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"jersey-crewneck-t-shirt-all-fits-certified-golf-sicko-lifestyle-polo-t-shirt","title":"Jersey Crewneck T-Shirt - All Fits - 'POLO' Certified Golf Sicko","description":"¡Órale carnal! Don Panchito here with the official description for this lifestyle t-shirt. Listen up — this one stays in the parking lot. Private clubs would lose their minds if you tried to wear it on the course, and that’s exactly why we made it.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWe took the classic POLO logo, told the horse to go fuck itself, and replaced it with a cold black silhouette of a golfer mid-swing. On the back, we put a minimal “GOLF” lettering in bold plus a smooth “Certified Sicko” underneath. It’s the same energy as the original, just for the real degenerates who know when to keep it off the property.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis is your off-duty uniform. Throw it on after the round while you’re still talking shit about the lip-out on 17. Wear it to the 19th hole while you lie about your score. Rock it on range days when you’re not even playing — just there to nut and watch. Perfect for the drive home, the airport on the way to your next trip, the group chat, or just walking around looking like a problem.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSoft jersey feel. Comfortable fit. Zero dress code violations because this shirt knows its place… and it ain’t inside the ropes.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nFor the ones who don’t just play golf. They live it.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n¡Órale! That’s pure. Go put this on where they’ll actually let you, you beautiful sickos.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% ring-spun cotton\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Garment-dyed\u003cbr\u003e\n• Relaxed fit\u003cbr\u003e\n• 7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003cbr\u003e\n• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability\u003cbr\u003e\n• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems","brand":"SMILEY GOLF","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":52752546529561,"sku":"4418974_15114","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":52752546562329,"sku":"4418974_15115","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":52752546595097,"sku":"4418974_15116","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":52752546627865,"sku":"4418974_15117","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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(Yo!)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nListen up, you beautiful sickos...\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis ain’t just a t-shirt. This is a fucking uniform.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nLeft chest. Classic Coca-Cola red script. But instead of selling you sugar water, it says Golf Sicko in that same iconic, dripping, 1950s cursive that makes old heads emotional. White shirt. Red letters. Zero subtlety. Just pure, unfiltered golf obsession sitting right over your heart like it belongs there.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nYou throw this bad boy on and the whole world knows exactly what you are. No more hiding it. No more pretending you’re “normal.” \u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis tee is not for the golf course. This is for real life. Wear it to brunch, to the bar, to the grocery store, to pick up your kids, to your in-laws' house — wherever the fuck you go when you’re not chasing a little white ball. Soft, broken-in cotton that feels like your favorite old towel after 18 holes. Relaxed fit, looks clean with jeans, shorts, or even under a light jacket when you’re pretending to be civilized.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nIf you're not thinking about golf right now, you’re doing it wrong!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nComfortable enough to swing in, tough enough to survive cart path beers and aggressive high-fives. Fits true. Looks mean. Feels right.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis is for the real ones. The ones who see a golf course and hear church bells. The ones who’d rather be on the first tee than anywhere else on earth.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSo go ahead. Put it on.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWelcome to the club, brother!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nNow get out there and nut on ‘em.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% ring-spun cotton\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Garment-dyed\u003cbr\u003e\n• Relaxed fit\u003cbr\u003e\n• 7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003cbr\u003e\n• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability\u003cbr\u003e\n• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems","brand":"SMILEY GOLF","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":52752576086297,"sku":"3330752_15124","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":52752576119065,"sku":"3330752_15125","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":52752576151833,"sku":"3330752_15126","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":52752576184601,"sku":"3330752_15127","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":52752576217369,"sku":"3330752_15128","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":52752576250137,"sku":"3330752_16335","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL","offer_id":52752576282905,"sku":"3330752_17508","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0722\/4829\/5705\/files\/unisex-garment-dyed-heavyweight-t-shirt-white-front-6a442e119fe19.jpg?v=1782853153"},{"product_id":"jersey-crewneck-t-shirt-all-fits-bazooka-joe-certified-golf-sicko","title":"Jersey Crewneck T-Shirt - All Fits - 'BAZOOKA JOE' Certified Golf Sicko","description":"¡Órale, you certified sickos!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nListen up — this ain’t no regular golf shirt you wear on the course like some try-hard. This is straight lifestyle heat, cabrón. The Certified Golf Sicko t-shirt, Bazooka Joe edition, built for the ones who are still thinking about their 7-iron gap even when they’re at the grocery store.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nOn the left chest you got little Joe as your monogram — that one-eyed, blue-cap-wearing pinche cabrón staring back at you like he knows you sliced your drive again. Small, clean, and cocky as hell. It’s the secret handshake for real golf sickos.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nRock it around and on the back neck, right where it counts, it says “Certified Golf Sicko” — subtle but loud enough that when you peel that shirt off after a long day, everyone knows you’re not playing around. Red and blue popping harder than a fresh flag on 18. Vintage comic energy, zero apologies.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis tee is for the brewery after your round. For the gym when you’re still pissed about that three-putt. For the airport when you’re flying to Scottsdale with your sticks in the bag and zero plans to relax. Not for the course. 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PEANUT - a golf nut' Golf Sicko","description":"This one's a straight-up classic for the crew that's always nutting every day. Front left chest hits you with that legendary Mr. Peanut, but reppin' our lifestyle hard — full golfer drip, argyle vest, top hat swapped for pure \"GOLF SICKO\" in bold letters instead of his usual name. He's winking, leaning on his iron like he just drained a 30-footer and knows he's better than you.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nBack of the neck? Clean scripted \"a golf nut\" in that elegant cursive, subtle but loud enough for the boys to spot.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nPerfect for everyday wear (not course-approved, we keep it lifestyle, baby — pair it with jeans, shorts, whatever the fuck you're feeling). Soft, premium feel so you can rock it from the driving range to the bar.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nI'm already half-hard just thinking about the whole collection. ¡Pura vida, Golf Nutz!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% ring-spun cotton\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Garment-dyed\u003cbr\u003e\n• Relaxed fit\u003cbr\u003e\n• 7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003cbr\u003e\n• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability\u003cbr\u003e\n• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems","brand":"SMILEY GOLF","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":52752717054233,"sku":"1398224_15114","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":52752717087001,"sku":"1398224_15115","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":52752717119769,"sku":"1398224_15116","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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